Spaceballs Movie Lines



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Spaceballs movie lines rating: PG





"Make way for Dark Helmet."



"What? You went over my helmet?"



"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here on this most joyous occasion. To witness Princess Vespa, daughter of King Roland, going right past the alter heading down the ramp and out the door..."



"Well, if it isn't Lone Starr and his sidekick, Puke."

"That's Barf."



"A hundred thousand space bucks, by tomorrow!?"



"Shall I have Snotty beam you down, sir?"



"Is it safe?"

"Oh yes sir, Snotty beamed me twice last night. It was wonderful."



"Careful you idiot, I said across her nose not up it!"

"Sorry sir, doing my best."

"Who made that man a gunner?"

"I did sir. He's my cousin."

"Who his he?"

"He's an Asshole, sir."

"I know that? What's his name?"

"That is his name sir, Asshole. Major Asshole."

"And his cousin?"

"He's an Asshole too sir, Gunner's Mate First Class, Phillip Asshole."

"How many assholes we got on this ship anyhow!?"

"YO!"

"I knew it, I'm surrounded by assholes. ... Keep firing, Assholes."



"The radar sir, it seems to be... jammed."

"Jammed...? Raspberry. There is only one man who would dare give me the raspberry. Lone Starr!"



"Radar repaired. We're picking up the outline of a Winnebago."

"Lone Starr!"



"What should we do now, sir?"

"Well... are we stopped?"

"We're stopped, sir."

"Good. Why don't we take a five minute break."

"Very good sir."

"Smokem' if you gottem!"






"When does this happen in the movie?"

"Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything that happens now. Is happening now, sir."

"What happened to then?"

"We past then."

"When?"

"Just now!"

"We're at now, now."

"Go back to then."

"When?"

"When?"

"Now?"

"I can't!"

"Why?"

"We missed it."

"When?"

"JUST now."

"When will then be now?"

"Soon..."



"Dink-dink...dink-dink."



"Heard of you? Who hasn't heard of Yoghurt!?"



"The Force?"

"No, the Schwartz."



"Never underestimate a power of the Schwartz!"



"There's two sides to every Schwartz."



"I didn't see you playing with your dolls, sir."

"Good."



"... She's a bass."



"It's Minute Maid. She's gone from suck to blow!"



"At last we meet, for the first time, for the last time."



"There is something you should know about us, Lone Starr."

"What?"

"I am your father's, brother's, nephew's, cousin's former roommate."



"I see your Schwartz is as big as mine."



"I'll have the cleavage...err special."



"Who are you?"

"I'm the best man."

"What's your name?"

"Barf."

"Your full name."

"Barfolemew."




Spaceballs Review

Director: Mel Brooks

Writers: Mel Brooks, Thomas Meehan and Ronny Graham

Released: June 24, 1987

Movie length: 96 minutes

Cast: Mel Brooks - President Skroob/Yoghurt

Rick Moranis - Dark Helmet

Bill Pullman - Lone Starr

Daphne Zuniga - Princess Vespa

John Candy - Barfolemew 'Barf'

George Wyner - Colonel Sandurz

Joan Rivers - Dot Matrix

Dick Van Patten - King Roland

Michael Winslow - Radar Technician

Lorene Yarnell - Dot Matrix

John Hurt - Kane

Sal Viscuso - Radio Operator

Ronny Graham - Minister

JM J. Bullock - Prince Valium

Leslie Bevis - Commanderette Zircon



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