Scrooged Movie Lines

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Scrooged movie lines rating: PG-13

"It's Lee Majors, the six million dollar man!"

"Santa, is there a back way out of this place?"

"Of course there is Lee, but this is one Santa that's going out the front door."

"Seven o'clock. Psychos seize Santa's workshop, and only Lee Majors can stop them... 'The Night The Reindeer Died'."

"Hey Mom, where's Dad? He should of been home by now."

"Well Wally, if I know your father he's out chasing beaver."

"... 'Father Loves Beaver'."

"Oh... my gosh. Does that suck."

"You guys have got an ad, with America's favorite old fart. Reading a book, in front of a fire place. Now, I have to kill all of you!"

"Acid rain. Drug addiction. International terrorism. Freeway killers. Now more than ever, it is important to remember the true meaning of Christmas. Don't miss Charles Dickens immortal classic; Scrooge. Your life might just depend on it..."

"Elliot Laudermilk. Code nine..."

"Grace, what in the hell is this?"

"That's a painting one of my kids did! There's Santa Claus, and there Mrs. Claus."

"Honey, how many fingers does Mrs. Santa Claus have here?"


"Right! It's crap! Lose it! I don't want it on the wall!"

"Grace, put yourself down for a towel too."

"What about my bonus?"

"Towel and a face cloth."

"We'll own Christmas."

"If only I could fire that poor son of a bitch!"

"Grace, I need a full report on a guy named Bryce Cummings. He's an L.A slime ball."

"Bye bye, Grandma. Bye bye!"

"Wooo-eee! That was a good one!"

"Bango! Bango! Boppo! Boombo! Babbam! Babbam! Blam...blam..."

"I don't mind you hitting me Frank, but take it easy on the Bacardi!"

"But you're... dead."

"Seven years."

"God, has it been that long? Jeez... I mean to look at you... I wouldn't of guessed more than three, tops."

"I was a captain of industry. Feared by men, adored by women."

"Adored... Let's be honest Lou, you paid for the women."

"You are going to be visited... by three ghosts."

"Three ghosts?"

"Expect the first one, tomorrow at noon."

"God, tomorrow's bad for me, Lou. Matter of fact, the whole rest of the week is a wash out. Ouch, well maybe we can have drinks say, Thursday? You, me the ghost. Trader Vic's, around four? Something like that?"

"This is no joke, Frank. This is your last chance."

"Alright, I could squeeze you in for a breakfast..."

"Oh... who's that? She's pretty."

"She's dead, Frank."

"I want to see her nipples."

"But this is a Christmas show!"

"Well, Charles Dickens would of wanted to see her nipples then."

"You can hardly see them nipples."

"See, these guys are really looking. You can go shake a tail feather..."

"Excuse me, Lumpy?"

"Around here people call me, Mr. Cross."

"I'm sorry, I'm new here and I got a problem. "

"I bet. What?"

"Our problem is this little fella. I can't the antlers glued on to this guy. We tried crazy glue, but it don't work. "

"Have you tried staples?"

"Marley, Perkins... the road!"

"Beautiful story. Tell 'Reader's Digest' will ya?"

"You little worm! Who are you!? How'd you get in here? Well, maybe you'll answer some questions downtown, huh my friend?"

"He's my son!"

"Alright you beat him... Does he work here?"

"No, he does not. I thought it would be fun for him to see a live television show!"

"Do you see anybody having fun here!?"

"Frank, what did happen last night?"

"Claire, it was something I ate, it was probably a bad clam or something, we don't know yet..."

"Would you please... for the love of God! And your own body... hold the hammering!?"

"Where are we?"

"You mean, when..."

"Go back to Jersey, you moron!"

"Guess my Dad hasn't put up the lights yet!"

"Oh... for Christ sakes Frank, it's Christmas Eve!"

"Merry Christmas!"

"A choo-choo train?"

"No, its five pounds of veal!"

"Garden slugs got more out of life than you."

"Huh huh ha ha ha... Name one."

"I've never liked a girl enough to give her twelve sharp knives."

"Its a bone, ya lucky dog!!"

"Ya... Buddy. I'm crazy... crazy like a fox!"

"Vincinia. I know. The rain. By foe, I by thy foe of geeops... I swear, therefore I foreswear. Now beat it!... Before I beat you!"

"If you touch me again, I'm gunna rip your god damn wings off!"

"Oh... look Frank! It's a... TOASTER!"

"Break a leg everybody, I feel real weird about tonight."

"I know what you came for come and get it you... pussy."

"Stop scaring Frank! Get this nut cake out of here."

"He's in the show Mr. Cross, as the ghost of Christmas future."

"He' great. That guys gunna be a big star."

"Hey... back off big man, that may work with the chicks, but not me."

"I'm alive! Holy shit, what a break! Oh god... its the sun! I thought I'd never see the sun again! I'm alive!"

"Not for long!"

"... Milk Man!!"

"You glad to see me, or is this a shot gun in your pocket?"

"I was looking for a Francis Xavier Cross."

"That's me. But the great thing... is it's not me. The Jews taught me this great word. Shmuck. I was a shmuck. But now... I'm not a shmuck."

"Can you get me to the IBC building in three minutes!?"

"What floor?"

"It's Christmas Eve... it's the one night of the year we all act a little nicer. We smile a little easier. We cheer a little more. For a couple hours out of the whole year... we are the people that we always hoped we would be. It's a miracle! It's really a sort of a miracle. Because it happens every Christmas Eve. And if you waste that miracle, you're gunna burn for it! I know what I'm talking about..."

"You're like boating a marlin. ... Claire, the whole world. The whole world, Claire. And they lived happily ever after."

"My brother, the King of Christmas!"

Scrooged Review

Director: Richard Donner

Writers: Mitch Glazer, Michael O'Donoghue and Charles Dickens

Released: November 23, 1988

Movie length: 101 minutes

Cast: Bill Murray - Frank Cross

Karen Allen - Claire Phillips

John Forsythe - Lew Hayward

John Glover - Brice Cummings

Bob Goldthwait - Eliot Loudermilk

David Johansen -Ghost of Christmas Past

Carol Kane - Ghost of Christmas Present

Robert Mitchum -Preston Rhinelander

Nicholas Phillips -Calvin Cooley

Michael J. Pollard -Herman

Alfre Woodard - Grace Cooley

Mabel King - Gramma

John Murray - James Cross

Jamie Farr - Jacob Marley

Robert Goulet - Himself

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